Warning: Includes cursing.
Okay, do you guys have something that pisses you off way more than it should?
And I can´t be things where it´s perfectly reasonable to be angry. It can´t be how you hate it when people lie, or when someone calls you ugly names. It´s reasonable to be angry when this happens.
I´m thinking about something that pisses you off, even when it really, really shouldn´t.
For me, it´s when people say that something taste like Christmas.
I mean, obviously I don´t hate the idea of it tasting like Christmas; I´m not the Grinch. On the contrary then I love Christmas. The snow, the hot cocoa, the sparkling tree in the middle of the living room. Christmas is without a doubt my single most favourite holiday. It represents everything joyful (and admittedly rather capitalistic) about our society. I love Christmas.
So when someone tells me that something tastes like Christmas, my expectations are, logically, quite high. I want to take a bite and see a mother-fucking Christmas tree. I want to hear carols, and smell chocolate chip cookies, and feel a wrapped gift in my hands.
This is what it means when something tastes like Christmas.
I´ll admit that maybe my expectations might be a tad… unrealistic. But it is what it is. So when someone says that something tastes like Christmas, it had better taste like fucking Christmas.
And then I take a bite and it tastes like cinnamon.
Are you kidding me?
And I want to scold them. I want to tell them that they´ve done something horrible. I want them to know that they belong in the same place of Hell as people who sells you a raisin bun without informing you that the raisins aren´t, in fact, chocolate chips.
And I get angry.
And I can´t. Because… I mean, what kind of psychopath gets angry over something like that?
So I close my eyes, and I take a deep breath and I curse them silently to a life of stepping on Legos and just missing their busses.
I know that my reaction isn´t reasonably. I know that it´s irrational.
But God damn it!
Cinnamon isn´t Christmas, and I´ll fight anyone who´ll say it is.
Christmas is mother-fucking Christmas.
And nothing less.